Every Life Matters
I learned in church this morning today is Sanctity of Life day. A day when we celebrate life. A day when we acknowledge that all life matters. The lives of babies, born and unborn, those with special needs, those with disease, the aged, the outcast, the lovable and the unloveable. They all matter to God and they should all matter to us, especially those who call themselves a Christian.
Several years ago I was given the opportunity to share our story on this special day in our church services. The story of one of our most precious gifts. Our youngest son, Zachary. His life matters. It has for 15 years and God had a plan for him before he was even born.
I thought today was a perfect opportunity to share that story again.
Today is a day to celebrate life and we wanted to share the story of how we came to adopt our son Zachary. He doesn't really like for us to talk about his adoption, but he gave us permission to today as long as we said all good things about him.
When I was a child, I always wished that I had a big family. I have one older brother and only two 1st cousins so family gathering were never very large. I hoped when I grew up that I would have several children, but I never expected that I would have the privilege of being the mother of five children.
John and I were married in 1998 and we each had two children from our previous marriages. John's daughter, Lisa was 15 and his son, Chris was 12. My Christopher was 7 and Stephanie was 4. (Yes, we have two sons named Christopher). We knew we would not be able to have any children together, but often talked about how fun it would be if we could. We lived in Alaska for the first year and a half of our marriage and began the process of blending our family. We had custody of all four of our children and I began to really enjoy having the big family that I had always wanted. In 2000 the Air Force transferred us to Hawaii and we were delighted to leave the frigid arctic and travel to the warmth of the tropics for our last military assignment.
John was assigned to the Pacific Headquarters working in the Family Support division and I worked as the financial secretary for the church we attended. On December 10th of 2001 a miracle began in the life of our family. Zachary, who was 5 weeks old, at the time, came to live with us as our foster child.
Zachary's biological mother, was 31 years old, divorced, and the mother of two boys who were in the care of their grandparents. When she became pregnant, she wasn't certain who the father of her baby was, but she was determined to give him life and wanted desperately to provide a home for him and care for him herself. She had been adopted as a baby by a wonderful Christian couple who couldn't have children of their own and had already adopted two children. For the first month of her life she was terribly neglected and this neglect left permanent scars on her, including the inability to work or function in an normal way in society.
When Zachary was three weeks old his biological mother brought him to the church, during the work week, for a visit and we sat for a while talking about the challenges of motherhood, being a single parent and how hard taking care of a newborn can be. She shared with me that she wasn't sure that she could continue to care for Zachary because he seemed to cry all the time and she didn't know what to do for him. She needed help with the baby so I offered to provide any assistance that I could. It was clear to me after our visit that God was beginning to work on my heart regarding this precious baby boy.
I drove straight to John's office after work that day and began to tell him about Zachary and the difficult time his mother was having caring for him. I told him that I wanted to consider adopting Zachary. John asked me if I had lost my mind. I reminded him of a dream I had several years before. When I was a single mother, after my first marriage had ended, struggling to make ends meet, I prayed diligently about the future God had for my life and the life of my children. One night in a dream, I believe God revealed to me that I would be married again and have another baby boy in my life, one that I would not give birth to. When I reminded John of the dream we agreed to do what ever we could to help in the situation and wait for God to work out the details, even if that meant only being a part of Zachary's life for a season. We didn't have the financial resources to adopt a baby so we knew that it would be very difficult to go through that process, but John and I agreed that we needed to do whatever we could for this little boy. Zachary stayed over night with us several times during the next week and his biological mother struggled with the idea of giving up her child. It was clear to us that he was being overfed and was miserable because of it. He cried most of the time and we would later learn that he had physical and neurological issues that caused much of his discomfort. We were willing to accept any limitations he would have and be his advocate and protectors in society that might not understand his past and disabilities.
Five weeks after coming to live with us his biological mother decided to allow us the privilege of adopting Zachary. We have come to understand that Zachary is the baby from my dream. Zachary is the name his biological mother gave him at birth and we had the option of changing his name. When we learned his name's meaning, we knew he was the baby from my dream, Zachary means, the Lord remembered or remembered by God.
We have been so blessed to have Zachary as a part of our family and we are so thankful that his biological mother chose to give him life. In the situation she was in, we know that she felt helpless. No husband, very little income and a baby only added to the stress in her life. The easy way out might have been to have an abortion. But, she made the decision that would change our family forever and at the time she didn't even know it. His biological mother loved Zachary very much and tried very hard to provide for him and take good care of him. She just wasn't able. Not only did she make the decision to give him life, she made a huge sacrifice when she realized that she wasn't able to provide for his needs and chose us to be his parents.
On October 21, 2002 (days before his first birthday) our adoption of Zachary was final. It was a day of celebration. We marked the day by having our family portrait made. I am sure you won't be surprised to hear that God worked out all of the details. Because we were Zachary's foster parents, the state of Hawaii paid for the adoption. It was completely free for us. We have always believed in the sanctity of life, but having Zachary in our life in the miraculous way that he came only confirms that belief. We wouldn't want to imagine our life without Zachary. Being a parent isn't easy. I have often said it is like being pecked on by a duck. It won't kill you, but it might drive you crazy. We love having a large family, although when we are called a large party at restaurants we wonder why they think our life is always a party. As our children continue to become grown ups we look forward to having many more grandchildren and our family growing even larger.
I wouldn't trade my family for anything. I have the large family I always wanted and so much more. They all fill my heart with so much happiness.
Until we meet again.
Several years ago I was given the opportunity to share our story on this special day in our church services. The story of one of our most precious gifts. Our youngest son, Zachary. His life matters. It has for 15 years and God had a plan for him before he was even born.
I thought today was a perfect opportunity to share that story again.
Today is a day to celebrate life and we wanted to share the story of how we came to adopt our son Zachary. He doesn't really like for us to talk about his adoption, but he gave us permission to today as long as we said all good things about him.
When I was a child, I always wished that I had a big family. I have one older brother and only two 1st cousins so family gathering were never very large. I hoped when I grew up that I would have several children, but I never expected that I would have the privilege of being the mother of five children.
John and I were married in 1998 and we each had two children from our previous marriages. John's daughter, Lisa was 15 and his son, Chris was 12. My Christopher was 7 and Stephanie was 4. (Yes, we have two sons named Christopher). We knew we would not be able to have any children together, but often talked about how fun it would be if we could. We lived in Alaska for the first year and a half of our marriage and began the process of blending our family. We had custody of all four of our children and I began to really enjoy having the big family that I had always wanted. In 2000 the Air Force transferred us to Hawaii and we were delighted to leave the frigid arctic and travel to the warmth of the tropics for our last military assignment.
John was assigned to the Pacific Headquarters working in the Family Support division and I worked as the financial secretary for the church we attended. On December 10th of 2001 a miracle began in the life of our family. Zachary, who was 5 weeks old, at the time, came to live with us as our foster child.
Zachary's biological mother, was 31 years old, divorced, and the mother of two boys who were in the care of their grandparents. When she became pregnant, she wasn't certain who the father of her baby was, but she was determined to give him life and wanted desperately to provide a home for him and care for him herself. She had been adopted as a baby by a wonderful Christian couple who couldn't have children of their own and had already adopted two children. For the first month of her life she was terribly neglected and this neglect left permanent scars on her, including the inability to work or function in an normal way in society.
When Zachary was three weeks old his biological mother brought him to the church, during the work week, for a visit and we sat for a while talking about the challenges of motherhood, being a single parent and how hard taking care of a newborn can be. She shared with me that she wasn't sure that she could continue to care for Zachary because he seemed to cry all the time and she didn't know what to do for him. She needed help with the baby so I offered to provide any assistance that I could. It was clear to me after our visit that God was beginning to work on my heart regarding this precious baby boy.
I drove straight to John's office after work that day and began to tell him about Zachary and the difficult time his mother was having caring for him. I told him that I wanted to consider adopting Zachary. John asked me if I had lost my mind. I reminded him of a dream I had several years before. When I was a single mother, after my first marriage had ended, struggling to make ends meet, I prayed diligently about the future God had for my life and the life of my children. One night in a dream, I believe God revealed to me that I would be married again and have another baby boy in my life, one that I would not give birth to. When I reminded John of the dream we agreed to do what ever we could to help in the situation and wait for God to work out the details, even if that meant only being a part of Zachary's life for a season. We didn't have the financial resources to adopt a baby so we knew that it would be very difficult to go through that process, but John and I agreed that we needed to do whatever we could for this little boy. Zachary stayed over night with us several times during the next week and his biological mother struggled with the idea of giving up her child. It was clear to us that he was being overfed and was miserable because of it. He cried most of the time and we would later learn that he had physical and neurological issues that caused much of his discomfort. We were willing to accept any limitations he would have and be his advocate and protectors in society that might not understand his past and disabilities.
Five weeks after coming to live with us his biological mother decided to allow us the privilege of adopting Zachary. We have come to understand that Zachary is the baby from my dream. Zachary is the name his biological mother gave him at birth and we had the option of changing his name. When we learned his name's meaning, we knew he was the baby from my dream, Zachary means, the Lord remembered or remembered by God.
We have been so blessed to have Zachary as a part of our family and we are so thankful that his biological mother chose to give him life. In the situation she was in, we know that she felt helpless. No husband, very little income and a baby only added to the stress in her life. The easy way out might have been to have an abortion. But, she made the decision that would change our family forever and at the time she didn't even know it. His biological mother loved Zachary very much and tried very hard to provide for him and take good care of him. She just wasn't able. Not only did she make the decision to give him life, she made a huge sacrifice when she realized that she wasn't able to provide for his needs and chose us to be his parents.
On October 21, 2002 (days before his first birthday) our adoption of Zachary was final. It was a day of celebration. We marked the day by having our family portrait made. I am sure you won't be surprised to hear that God worked out all of the details. Because we were Zachary's foster parents, the state of Hawaii paid for the adoption. It was completely free for us. We have always believed in the sanctity of life, but having Zachary in our life in the miraculous way that he came only confirms that belief. We wouldn't want to imagine our life without Zachary. Being a parent isn't easy. I have often said it is like being pecked on by a duck. It won't kill you, but it might drive you crazy. We love having a large family, although when we are called a large party at restaurants we wonder why they think our life is always a party. As our children continue to become grown ups we look forward to having many more grandchildren and our family growing even larger.
I wouldn't trade my family for anything. I have the large family I always wanted and so much more. They all fill my heart with so much happiness.
Until we meet again.
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